I should not be lying to myself.. Telling myself..Its ok...Your're happy..Everything is fine..Go with the flow..ITS BULLSHIT...I  should just let myself be me..But the thing is..I have been lying to myself so often..I forgot what it was like to be me..What i used to be..Which makes things even worst then what it already was before..

Damn it what is wrong with me..has god actually forsaken me?? :'(